I have not been very present on this blog, but I've written
quite a bit about my life as a teacher elsewhere. I've put together some snippets of my
experience as a middle school teacher in Ulsan.
I am sorely in need of a break but I'm very content to be working with
teenagers. I'm rarely bored!
September
That awkward moment when you hear a group of 14-year-old
boys standing outside of your office rehearsing their English conversations
with you, and the vocabulary includes "Hello, I love you, teacher..."
Just to prove that Korean students can be as naughty as
children anywhere else: During a particularly terrible class session I had to
write "NO HITTING" on the white board. I left it up for the rest of
the afternoon. After my cleaners left the classroom upon dismissal, I found the
"NO" had been erased and replaced with "Yes," so my board
stated "Yes HITTING." In spite
of their talent at being pains in my ass, I love those little monsters.
October
Today I learned an important lesson: that I am not above bribery,
and neither are my students. I brought candy as an incentive for participation,
and I soon had students literally standing on their desks, holding up signs
saying: "Teacher I don't have candy. You are beautiful woman. Please
choose me. I love you" and "You are pretty girl. I'm Jeff. Choose me
please" and "I love you. I'm Billy. You are beautiful beautiful
beautiful beautiful girl."
Yes, they were sucking up, but I'm a sucker for flattery.
Have I mentioned lately that I love my job?
Yesterday, I had a terrible class that made me cry out of
frustration. Today, I had a class that clapped, "wow"ed, and said
"I love you, Teacher." Teaching is a package deal, and I love it.
Yelling "야" in class to get my students'
attention certainly worked, although I wasn't expecting them to laugh so hard
at my attempt to speak Korean. Also: I had a student make the S-line gesture at
me and give me a thumbs up saying, "Very sexy, Teacher!"
Never a dull moment at 다우중학교!
The class activity today is conversation and students are
encouraged to ask me questions. I just had a student look me in the face and
ask, "Teacher. How babies make?"
Oh, adolescence.
I was just asked for my phone number twice, and once for my
hand in marriage.
My student Amanda asked me "Which boy in this class is
the most handsome?" I declined to
answer. The fact that I'm only 8 years
older than the third graders has seemed to blur the lines of propriety in many
of the boys' minds. I don't want to
encourage that.
I may have just permanently damaged my reputation by
answering, "Teacher, when was your first kiss?"
Do middle-schoolers ever think about anything else?
One of my students discarded the English name I gave him and
renamed himself "Sexyboy."
Umm... sorry, kid, but I'm not calling you that.
 |
| Apple, Kristin, Kelly, me |
 |
| Kelly, me, Judy, Apple |
Sketchiness is a small price to pay for these moments.
November
So "William" (my student I named after the Bard
and any number of English Romantic Poets) returned to my class after being
suspended with a bigger crush on me than before. When I asked my students what
they thought of a music video we watched together, he raised his hand. I called
on him and he said, "Teacher." "Yes, William?"
"Teacher. Beautiful. I love you."
"Thanks William, but what did you think of the music
video?"
"Teacher is very, very beautiful." He proceeded to
clap at this idea
I also overheard him ask my coteacher something in English,
to which she responded, "It's 'Do you want to go on a date with me?'"
Oh dear...
This afternoon, my colleague informed me of the magical
teachers' lounge with couches and beds for sleeping. How could I have worked at
다운중학교
for two and a half months without knowing about this?
Of course, this magical room is where I spent my sixth
period.
Today, students were supposed to ask or answer a
question. William had a too-big grin on
his face when I called on him: "Teacher!" All the boys in his cluster were
laughing.
"Yes, William?"
"Teacher, do you have a boyfriend?"
I sighed. I could
either lie to placate him, inadvertently encouraging his crush on me, or I
could inform the entire class of my recent news. I chose the latter. "Yes, William. I do have a boyfriend." William looked up with his sad, wide eyes
before dropping his head onto his desk and exclaiming, "Teacher, I
cry!"
"I'm sorry, William!
미안해. But I'm too old for you! I'm an ajumma to you.
At this point the whole class (who had been loudly reacting
to their newly acquired information about my personal life) protested, "Oh
no, no, Teacher! You are not ajumma, you
are girl!"
December
It's really sweet to see the schoolyard romances of my
students. I have to stop myself from enveloping them into group hugs and
exclaiming my happiness for their happiness... Somehow I don't think that would
be a professional course of action. But they sure are adorable!
Teaching a lesson on Self-Esteem is really fun when your
students feel good about themselves, but it's heartbreaking when your student
turns in the "I Like Myself" worksheet you made and answered every
question with "nothing.
That awkward moment when your student has a massive crush on
you and you accidentally touch his butt... Oh, dear.
I'm experiencing my first proper snowfall in Ulsan with my
students. Life is simply beautiful.
"Dear Santa, my name is Roy. This year I have been a little naughty. Please give me a girlfriend because I'm
lonely. I will leave you my love on
Christmas Eve! Merry Christmas."
